Dominant Thoughts

 At the beginning of every month, my partner and I will put the kids to bed, and then sit down to pay the bills.  This is not fun, or exciting and it would be much easier if one of us just went ahead and took care of it in between the other things they do all day. However, we do this because so many relationships are torn apart over financial conflicts.  By doing our bills together, we are both fully aware of where our money is going and take the time to discuss our financial goals and decisions.   As a result, we do not fight about money as we both know all there is to know about what we have and where it is spent.   By doing the work we have avoided one of the biggest pitfalls in any relationship.   We do the same thing with our intimacies.  We do the work, and it pays off. We have always played with a little bondage in the bedroom, but it was about seven years ago that we turned that play into our dynamic.  A dynamic in which we ...

  Once in a while, we get away for the kids for a night, or even a weekend away.  When this rare treat presents itself, it can be a fun time to turn the dynamic up to 11.  We call them protocol nights, though sometimes they can go all day.  It is a time when we can really stretch out our wings and let the kink sweep us away.  We don't do it every time we go out.  If we did, I fear it would make this feel like expected behavior and at the same time it would make the experience less special.  It's important that we have "vanilla" evenings out as well.  But this is not a Blog about vanilla experiences.    A protocol night is special.  It is a night out where she devotes herself to her submission and a night where I am careful to keep my eyes and ears open as a dominant.  It is a kind of pre-scene foreplay because, when we do a protocol night, the scene that follows is always amazing!   Different kinksters will have diffe...

 On a few social media sites lately, I have seen questions come up about safe-words.   I honestly wish I didn't need to address this subject.  It would be great if anyone practicing kink did so with a full dedication to safety and consent.  Unfortunately, from some of the toxic stuff I have seen online, it seems clear that this is not the case.   On Twitter, on Reddit and on TikTok, It feels like there are more people with questions and concerns about safe-words, if they need them, when they should be used, when they should be honored.    I can answer all of that very quickly before we go on.  Yes, you need a safe-word, You should use them whenever you feel the need to, Your partner damn well better honor them!   Now that I have clearly stated my position on the subject, there are a few things I have seen come up and I would like to address each of them.   Safe words are for submissives WRONG! In a D/s relationship, t...